Welcome to The Spice with Chilli Rox – a weekly advice corner from the sassiest seductress in the pole world. If you have a burning question you would like to ask Chilli, send it in an email to:
chillirox@auspoledancersmag.com.au
Anyone who gets their questions published will win a free month of Polesphere access! All questions are completely confidential.
Dear Chilli
I have been seeing a guy for five weeks and I feel that it is going quite well but am aware that he still has a profile up on a couple of dating sites. I have asked him about it and he said they are there but he hasn’t been using them however he hasn’t taken them down.
I am looking for a long term relationship and don’t really want to waste my time if he is waiting for something better to come along. Do I just cut my losses? How serious can he be if he hasn’t shut down his accounts?
Love, Mixed Messages
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Dear Mixed Messages,
Men take a little longer to know what they want than we do, I wouldn’t write him off just yet. I know a couple of guys who are on dating sites just for the ego boost and they never go on any dates, they just like to know other women are interested.
Beat him at his own game – get on a couple of dating sites yourself, don’t always be available to him. Be open to other opportunities and he will realise if he wants to keep you he will have to offer you security and get off those sites.
Also, ask yourself is he ticking your boxes?? You say you want to be in a long term relationship but do u want that with him? If the answer is yes, hang in there a little longer (3 weeks at least). Good luck.
Chilli x
Dear Chilli
I have come across a book entitled ‘The Rules’.. A guide for women on how to snag a hubby. The advice given seems very old school but some of my friends swear by it. What are your rules for snagging a man, and what do you think of these dating books?
Bookworm Babe
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Dear Bookworm Babe,
I haven’t read that book, but I think you should only take the advice that sounds good to you. I believe in matters of the heart, rules go out the window. We all make stupid love decisions sometimes and that’s okay.
The rule I have always believed is that men have two emotions: horny and hungry, so if he doesn’t have an erection make him a sandwich. Ahhhh relationship bliss! haha 🙂
Chilli x
Dear Chilli,
Is it still ok to offer to pay on a first date, open doors etc. or is all that kind of thing insulting these days? Sometimes it feels like my attempts at chivalry are either taken for granted or not appreciated at all!
Old fashioned guy
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Dear Old fashioned guy,
Please please please pay!!! Open doors, treat us like ladies. I have never heard a girl express offence at being treated like a lady, but I have heard a lot of shock from girls when they are because it is such a rare treat. Trust me, we wanna feel special.
Remember, a good woman will always want to do nice things in return so let her spoil you once in a while too.
Chilli x
